Monday, August 28, 2006

stress, pressure, letdown GAHHHH

wow i am under so much stress right now.. ok i signed up for wsi which is the sceond part to awsi. basically these courses are at the panorama and they are so that you have all the prober tryining to be a swimming instructor. well i am really stressed out in wsi right now because there is so much work that i have to get done . i have to write up lesson plans , long term and short term. and i was supposed to have all this done by today but i was to stressed out by it last night so i thought the best thing for me to do would be go to bed. and relax and then i could work some more on it today. well i am no good at this and i am just not having the fun or learning like i should be when i signed up for this course. my mom is saying that i could drop the course and take it later in the year when i feel more prepared. in my mind i am thinking ya i would love to do that but i am also thinking if i do that then i will feel like a quiter. and i really do not wanna be known as the girl who quit. also if i drop then my parents will be out 200 bucks for the course. the panorama can hold the money for if i sign up for something else. still my parents will have lost that money because i am stressed and ya. which makes me feel bad . also there is a feeling of let down inside of me. there are actually kids that i am supposed to teach. which is why we had to make up the lesson plans. (these kids signed up for a free class for excperience before entering the real calss) so i i drop i will feel like i have let thoes kids down and i will have let my parents partly down for not going through with this.


i am also worried that i did not even pass awsi. because every one else in my class got a card sent to them in the mail saying that they passed...i did not recive this card. and if you did not pass awsi then there is no way that you are going to be able to pass wsi. so you know what this is just a lot for me to handle. yes i feel like a quiter and a letdown if i drop out...... but then if i do drop out now before i am stuck too deep into it then i can just sign up to do volounteer work at the panorama so i get more experience make sure that i passed awsi and if i did not get the volounteer work done to pass awsi. and sign up for the next wsi course feeling confedent and more prepared to do what i need to do. i just hope not to many people are disapointed by me droping out that is my majour concern. it is not about me it is about the kids that will no longer be reciving free swimming lessons.

hopefully they can be moved into someone elses class

4 comments:

AfterVerner said...

Well, quitting isn't always a letdown. There is a way to quit well. I just don't know what it is. If it helps, you said your mom told you you could drop out. Your mom being one of your parents shows that the money isn't such a big issue. Sure, it's there, but she opened that option for you. If you didn't pass the first thinger, that's okay. If you tried your best there is nothing to be ashamed of. You can come back later and ace the thing. Stress doesn't really help anything. I haven't found a single person whom stress has helped. So try to relax and get it done as well. Don't focus on what happens if you can't do it. Focus on doing it. We still love you mate, and support you in almost anything. Not drugs though. Don't do drugs.

zeppelinphan said...

thanks werner that helped alot. i appreciate your comment. i did drop and i am going to start volountering at the panorama once a week starting in september till i feel comfortable enough to go and take the other course and make sure i passed the first one.

drewology said...

I don't think you should consider your self a quitter. Sometimes we get our selves into things that are simply over our heads. The important thing is that you didn't just drop the course and walk away. The fact that you are volunteering and going to try the course again speaks volumes about your quality and as Samwise Gamgee once said, "It is of the highest quality." It takes a big person to admit they may have bitten off more than they can chew. You are tops in my books.

-Andrew

Anonymous said...

Laura!!

You're my hero!! Way to be real!! And you're no a quitter for being real! It's just not the right time!! I really admire you for not putting yourself through any more stress!! :) yah!

I hope that made sense....