grumpy

ahh so i did not get a good night sleep. it was too hot. i could hear stephans hampster in its cage most of the night. the dog barked several times. the tenants were playing some kinda of music that had to much base for me to just tune out and sleep through. then some neibour decided to get out a power washer which was really loud that i could hear from here. the other neibour's kids have not stoped yelling. which i can understand kids yell and have fun but when your tired and grumpy its like ahhh what the fuck.

i feel sweaty and gross because it was way to hot last night but i dont have time for a shower cause i have to go to work soon.

im grumpy so im jelouse of addy who gets to just stay home and chill today. more and more latley my days off have just felt not that relaxing. my days off have not be days to myself. now dont get me wrong i love hanging with my friends and most of the time i do it is because it was my idea in the first place. but it is catching up with me. and realy making me wonder why people work there whole life in jobs that they hate. i am so glad i am going to school in september to learn to become a preschool teacher. a job that will no doubt make me tired just as much as anyother job would. but at least i will enjoy it. instead of waking up in the morning and thinking fuck, i have to go to work again.

i really wanna go to the lake. it is so hot out. and the last time i was supposed to go to the lake it rained.

maybe i can convince someone to wake up early and go to the lake with me on sunday before it is too busy and that way. i will still have time to come home and get changed to go out to the dress up dinner.

things are getting broken at the hosue we are house sitting. from the dog and other stuff. i dread having to explain this to the people who own the hosue when they get back.

im getting home sick for my own house. i miss my bed. and my room. i miss my family. even thought my dad sometimes has an overlywittyness and likes to make fun of me. but that is okay.

when i get off work today i am comming back to stephans, having a shower, putting on my pjs and doing nothing.

i dont want to hang with people. maybe ill just read a book or put in a movie.

the budz mom wants me to hosue sit for two weeks when im done house sitting here. i said id think about it but in all honesty i really dont want to. i just want to go home.

i need to get my full licence still ahhh
i need to get better at driving standard.

i cant fucking wait till im off this rock and out in california. its getting to the point were stimple things that is should be exsited about like getting my licence are starting to feel like a chore becuase im thinking to much about time and money and obligations.

this is fucking stupid. get me out of here

I WANT TO BREAK FREE

40 days till california