so, originally i was going to write this post about tmi tuesday. you know a couple days late. fill out all the questions and be done with it. but then i read the questions and they did not seem interesting enough for me. or i lacked creative responses instead of the very weak, and lame typical one word yes or no response. but i feel i should write something. so after that i desided well maybe i can write about the adventures that happend on the weekend. such as driving addy out to liz's house and that whole drama section of my life. but you know what that is addys life and not my place to post it on my blog. i continued to think about my weekend and about what had happend and it occured to me there is other stuff that i can write about. such as skinny dipping. a group of friends and i did that on valnetines day and we have decided that it is going to be our new valentines day tradition. honestly forget buying you loved ones presents just go skinny dipping with them. that is soooo much better and more fun.

then i thought well it is mainly my friends who went skinny dipping with me who read this blog, so there is no point in recalling to them what they participated in. even though it was really funny. and there was the incented of the random peice of seaweed that karen and i found in my towl, after i got dressed. and i offered it to her as a joke. not knowing what part of my body that it came off of. karen loled and then simply placed the peice of seaweed on the buddy christ that is now sitting in my car. i have left it there cause you know it makes for a good conversation starter. picture this your in a car and somone randomly askes why you have a peice of seaweed hanging off of a buddy christ bobble head. rofl, sounds like a good conversation starter to me.

i also thought that i could write in detail about how after that. jenni, fiona and i decided to go to the park and dance in our bras in the middle of the night. jenni took some pictures and i have to say they are very funny and i am going to have to ask her for them soon because they make me laugh. also when we were participating in this very fun underwear dance in the middle of a park at 2 in the morning jenni saw a cop car comming down the road and we quickly ran to our own vehicles and put our cloths on in fear of being stoped. or questioned. luckaly the police pulled over for a speeder who was going the other way. thank god for reakless drivers. :P.

then i thought that i could write about today. rant about the one preschool kid who does not like me becasue i made her share toys with other kids instead of hogging all of the toys to herself. oh how evil am i to make a kid share *note sarcasim*. infact today when she asked for help from laura the other teacher was like well laura is right behind you honey. this kid looked at me frowned then looked back and was like "no, i want the real laura". which is the name of the other teacher. the girl who runs the preschool.

but then as i was comming up with all these ideas on what to say and what to type. in the corner of my eye is saw that stupid little clown toy that my dad has. that for some stupid reason my dad likes to keep here. and i turn it around and my dad turnes it the other way around. clowns creep me out and i hate this one, and it is staring at me. and i want to distroy it but that would make my dad un happy cause its his kid toy. and to make things worse my brother put it in a tiny box. so now it is a little evil clown. poking out of a box. ITS STARING AT ME. and my dad is taunting me with it to get me off of the computer saying that im taking to long.

clowns are evil they should die.

okay so im going to do another tmi tuesday before i do that...AHHHH I ONLY GOT A B ON MY BIRTH PROJECT FOR WOMENS ANTHRO....it was dissapointing. i know that a b is good. but for once that paper felt like an A paper. DANG DANG DANG. *sigh*. that sucked. okay now on to tmi tuesday:

1. What do you think is the un-sexiest part of the body?
depends. if you asking males i would have to say penis. yes it is useful and nessicary for all the fun stuff but in all honesty penis's are ugly, and are not a turn on. i dont know about girls....maybe when they have really really huge boobs that are obviously fake

2. Toilet paper: over, under, or what the hell are you talking about?
i would say over. because other wise if it is under you usually end up with scrapes on your hands when you go into public washrooms cause your trying to reach past the spikyies to tair the toilet paper. then you end up with battle wounds on your hands. and i think the only battle wounds that one should have as a resulte of the bathroom should be a result of some passionate fun with a partner in some nice expensive hotel....prefurable one with a big bathtub :P

3. Have you ever called in sick to stay in bed with a sexual partner?
nope not yet becaues my "partner" and i are not sexualy active yet. and considering i start work at 5:30 in the morning. and i still live with my parents i dont belive that would go over to well...maybe ill try once i move out.

4. Did your parents have a "birds & bees" talk with you? Id so, at what age?
no my parents did not give me the birds and the bees talk. the funny thing is that my older brother did. well we were watching south park. then after that my parents made me tell them exsactly what he told me to make sure he did not teach me wrong. i dont know how old i was..i think i was 10...possible younger.

5. What is one thing a someone could do to you to rock your world?
-visit me randomly when im sick or emo, or make me something
i dont realy know actually. people always tend to surprise me with things and whatever the surprise is usualy rocks my world...i cannot pick a certain thing...i like creativity.

although that being said anything involving taking me to a lake or anywere to swim usually will work....hmmm water sex? lol jk

just a cool quote that i found by kevin smith.


My Father taught me how to be a man – and not by instilling in me a sense of machismo or an agenda of dominance. He taught me that a real man doesn’t take, he gives; he doesn’t use force, he uses logic; doesn’t play the role of trouble-maker, but rather, trouble-shooter; and most importantly, a real man is defined by what’s in his heart, not his pants.

so i had an epic adventure today. life is just grand

first was one of the worlds greatiest archetects and i help build and amazing tower and a house for a princess and her wonderful horse. then the princess and i desided to build a bridge and moat, of course me the loyal servant will do anything for a princess. then after that i took a journey to another land. in this land i was not a nobal archetect but instead i was an evil beast. this evil beast which i was had come to destroy the land and everything within it. but luckaly there was this one nobal man with a poisionus finger. he did not use his poisenus finger for bad though, only good. and he slayed me the most evil of all beast. i had quite a dramatic death. in which all the people of the village stoped and looked at the evil beast dying and then they cheered on the heroic boy.

after that i traveled even farther when i came to a land full of wizards. were we got in epic douls and most of the other wizards were better then me. i got turned into a number of things such as a frog and then eventually a bannana. after that i got to go on a quest for a young night to find his dimond which he had acedently lost behind the oven of the castles kitchen. then some very nice hair dresses about five i wil say, all decisded to give me a brand new hair do for free, oh there was snipping and brushing and lots of other wonderful things. after that magic journey it was time to go adventure to the land of outside. where there were many games that constantly went on such as tag. and i even saw one young man turn into a turtle and go down a slide. it was amazing. after that it was time to venture back to the castle where there was a great feast happening full of fruits and veggiis and pizza and cookies. (nom nom nom). well there were also stories being told and songs being sung.

after this i unfrotinitly was done my volunteer shift and toad preschool and had to snap back to reality. man i find little kids amazing they are so much fun although they did take some energy out of me. i cant wait to go back and volunteer on wednesday.

umm yes so thats my epic adventure.

oh and by the way because i could not swear today when i was with little kids : fuck, ass, shit, hell, cock, cunt, dam, bitch, ...pussy, clit,

okay i feels better :D

womens antrho homework

so here is the paper that i had to write up for my womens anthropology class. i had fiona edit it. she did not edit the ending though because of the fact that i had not writen that much when i sent it to her...so the ending probs sucks but the rest is realy good. umm ya for this paper i basically had to write about my birth, so just a warning thats what is writen here. alos this is really long..just a heads up. anyway enjoy :

Comparing my birth with many others North American births, mine was a complicated and risky business. This was because both of my parents carried genetic deficiencies that put the women and the baby at high risk of not surviving the labour process. In my father, the genetic issue was that the thirteenth chromosome had an extra hook. This defect makes it highly unlikely for fetus survival. My mother’s genetic defect was developed over time because she had a miscarriage in her past. The doctors told her that she would have a good chance of having Placentia previa in her future if she were to have children again. Of the circumstances that my mother went through because of the miscarriage, she needed to have Amniocenteses. This was to test a baby’s chromosomes to make sure that they were both healthy and surviving.

Unlike my birth, my older brother was born under normal circumstances of a North American culture. He went through the smooth procedure of delivery without a trace of alarm. On the other hand, my birth was an event of panic and fear of survival.

It started off the way most births would start off in a North American culture. When my mother started getting contractions, my dad instantly decided that she needed to be driven to the hospital. In the summer of 1989, however, there was a nurse’s strike and the hospital was short staffed and low on beds. When my parents first showed up at the hospital, the nurses had my mom walk around for a bit to wait to see how serious it was. After what the nurses considered a throughout assessment of my mother’s condition, they concluded that she was not ready to give birth and told her to go home. At the time of my brother’s birth in 1987, there was no nurse’s strike and my mother was let in right away. Unfortunately, in my case my mother was just told to hang around and walk around because of the lack of staff then eventually told to go home. On the way home after being told to leave, my mother and my father started to notice that she was bleeding a lot. So my father turned around and drove back to the hospital. When they got back to the hospital the nurses became aware of how much my mother was bleeding and started to worry. As a result of the crucial condition that my mother was in (by the time that she was ready to give birth to me) there was a lot of technology used. There was a lot less technology used in my brother’s birth.

For my brothers birth there was a heart rate monitor for the mother and for the baby, as well as other monitors to keep watch of the mother and the Childs vital signs. As well, my mother asked to take an epidural to take away the pain of childbirth. As for my birth, because of the fact that it was more complicated, there was a lot more technology. This technology was mainly needed because of the fact that I was a c-section baby. The technology that was used during this process was an ultrasound, and an aesthetic to make my mother unconscious during the c-section. As well because my mother was losing a lot of blood she needed to have a blood transfusion. After I was born I was placed in an incubator and fed through a feeding tube; I had been born seven weeks premature. My parents note that if it had not been for all of this technology, they do not believe that I or my mother would be alive today.

With my brothers birth there was no c-section for he came out quickly and painlessly. With my birth a c-section was needed. This was because, like the doctors had speculated earlier, my mother was suffering from Placentia previa. The placenta was tearing away from the uterus and my life support as a fetus had been failing. This was the reason my mother started to lose a lot of blood. Because of this my mother was unable to make any decisions. During my birth the doctor actually came out to my dad and gave him three options to choose from. The first one was that they continue to try natural labour and that there was a very low chance that either my mother or I would survive. The second option was that the doctors try to enduce labour. With that option the doctors said that only I would survive. The third option was a c-section. The doctor told my father that both my mother and I had a fifty percent survival rate. My father tells me that he saw that he only had one option, and that was the c-section.

In both my older brother’s birth, and mine my father had the option to attend and watch. My father attended my brother’s birth but, he did not attend mine. The doctor did give him the option to be present at my birth but because of the seriousness of the situation, my father did not feel it would do any good for him to be in there. He said that he felt if he were to go into the delivery room with everything that was going on he would just get in the way. Although my father does say he regrets that decision and that he wanted to be in the room. He said that he felt that the doctor had pressured him into not going into the room. The doctor was the one that made him feel like he would be in the way, and that him being there would not do any good.

Well in North American culture my brother’s birth can be seen as normal. The use of technology was normal. Things such as epidermal are seen as quite normal in today’s standards of birth. This is because mothers do not wish to feel the pain, and unlike in some other cultures it is not considered a loss in experience, or at lest it was not considered a loss in the experience for my mother. Through out my brother birth both my parents made the decisions as a couple. The decisions were not just left up to one person. Because my parents felt as a couple they could make decisions together and without it being a stressful situation such as my birth they had the time to do so. Also during my brother’s birth my father was allowed to attend. And did attend. There was no pressure felt from the doctors or from anyone else making him feel that he should not attend or that he had to attend. Well my birth I don’t believe can be seen as normal, for this culture. There was extra use of technology. This technology was needed at the time so that my mother and I could survive, but it was more what doctors would normally use. During the birthing process it was mainly left up to my father to make the major decisions. This could be considered unusual as most mothers are making the decisions during their own birthing process, or a couple makes them together but given the situation it was left up to my father. Also the last thing that makes my birthing process different was the fact that my father was unable to witness the birth. Not because he was no allowed to, but because he felt pressured by the doctors not too due to my mothers situation. In comparison my mother’s whole birthing experience with my brother can be seen as the more normal experience for most mothers in North American culture. Well the majority of the experiences that my mothers when through during the birthing experience with me are not viewed as quite so normal.

so im taking womens anthropology. and right now we are learning about birth, cross culturaly. which i am finding interesting. it is making me realize how depended on technology we are in this culture. oh my god it even starts when we are born. in the book we are reading there was even and interview with a nurse and she herself said that working in the delivery ward is like working on an assembly line. its all about go go go. get the women preped. get the baby out. make sure they are both healthy and then move onto the next one.

but that is not really what has me thinking. even though i could go on about how we are stuck on technology for hours. the ironic thing is that this is comming from the girl who has a cell phone, ipod, laptop and a car....so maybe i should not talk.

the thing that did strike me in class today was the fact that the author of the book that we are reading said that the whole studying of birth gig is best left up to women. she basically says that women will do a better and more efficent job. and if thats not enough the part that annoyed me was that even girls who dont want kids...or never plan on having kids. would do a better job studying the birth process then a man who is intrested in, or wants kids. i might be wrong but this sounds alot like sexism. okay i will agree that women my have a better advantage studying the whole birth and pregnancy process then men do.

they have this advantage becasue women will actually be allowed into the birthing hut in some cultures and areas around the world. well men are forbidden just because it is the culture, or becasue for a pregnant women who is giving birth is just really uncomfortable with the idea of a strange guy being there. well she may be less uncomfortable with a strage girl being there. do in that way i can see why girls would have an advantage. but i still do not belive that it should be said that guys would do a bad job.

for one. lets take north america, look at how many of the doctors here actually are men. in this culture where we are tought that it is not gender that gets you were you wanna be but it is intrest, hard work and education. so that means that women had the opertunity to be doctors and yet there are alot more men then there are women. so...men must be interested in the birthing process. and men must wanna study it, some men,. and men must be educated in how the body works and what to do. if this were not the case i dont know about you but i would seriously be questioning this countries doctors. even my doctor specializes in pregnant women. and my doctor is a guy. so you know what..i think this shows that yes guys can be interested and yes they can do an excellent job studying the birthing process if they were interested and deticated to what it was that they are studying.

One more point from me and then i will stop the rambling of this topic. there are so many different aspects one can take when studying the birthing process. yes, there is the actual birth but that is just a small part of it. there is also the whole other nine months. thoes nine months that the women is growing, and changing. the husband or partner is as well. he may not being going through all the physical changes that the women is but things are chaning. some fathers say that it even though they have been married for a while it is not untill their wife is pregnant that they start to realize that it is not all about them anymore, they are going to have a family that they feel that they have to protect and look after. a male may not be able to go into the birth hut, but well that is happening he could talk with the men. get the mens perspective. see how the men are growing and changing well the women is growing. couple grow together, or at least that is what i am always told. and what appears to happen.

so why is it then that we only have case studies on the women during the birth process? what is going on with the husbands and the other men in the family. i know a women carrying a baby for nine months, that whole process of another human being created out of what seems like nothing is facinating. what she goes through, and what she deals with.

but when has anyone done reserch on the guys? how they are changing? what they are going through? and how they deal with it?

how do these two people grow toghether

TMI

1. Have you ever dated/married purely for money?
nope, and i never plan on doing that. i belive love lasts longer then money

2. What is your type?
i dont know if i have a type. i like the ruged look.

3. What is the best sex game you have ever played?
i have never played a sex game

4. Have you ever given or received an orgasm from a person whose last name you did not know? no. i have never recived and orgasm from a person :P

5. Have you ever masturbated in front of a sexual partner?
no. and i dont really plan on doing so. whats the fun of playing one player in a two person game

so i was reading a book today forget what its called some random book that i picked up at work. and there was this one line that literaly made me lol. i think some of the customers thought that i was on crack cause i was randomly laughing...they could not see the book.

anyway the line was along the lines of

"if you ever want to make your boyfriend happy just blow up a car with a rocket launcher"

of course in the book the main girl who was talking was trying to take out a mob boss. and also she did miss and ended up hitting her own car. which the guy found histaricaly. knowing my luck if i ever had to take somone out with a rocket launcher i would end up hitting my own car :P.

but yes i found that quote funny.

umm i wonder were one can buy rocket launchers...incase matt ever gets emo and needs some cheering up.

also whose car would i destroy. lets all hope for our cars sake that matt never gets that emo.

becasue im thinking me + rocket launcher = alot of cars going up in flames.

so i will end with this

save a car make sure matthew is happy!!

i

tmi tuesday questions..only a couple days late

1. On a scale of 1-10, how satisfied are you with your sex life?
well im not actually having sex yet, but im in no rush to get into that. so i would say that it is good. i am satisfied.

2. If someone shoves you up against a wall while kissing you, your reaction is?
it sounds very hot, and delightful. hopefuly if it ever happens its as sexy as it sounds

3. What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
ummm, i cant think of anything really that romantic that anyone has done or said to me.

4. Where is the most unusual place you have ever had sex?
never had sex,


5. How do you liked to be kissed?
is it just me or does this sound like a stupid question....who does not like to be kissed.? i love to be kissed. but i am a chicken shit and am horrible at making the first move.

so im starting to wonder how i can be getting stressed out when it feels like im doing almost nothing this school year? is that possible? obviously. so this school year as i said i am only taking two courses. two. my first project is due on tuesday but that is now what im stressed out about. im getting stressed over everything else. lets see. my plan for this summer is to go and travel through scotland with fiona. this plan makes me uber happy becasue i have wanted to go to scotland since i was 15. i even have a giant poster of scotland in my bedroom. and fiona got me a giant scotland flag that hangs out in my bed room. so ya that gives you an idea of how into scotland i am.

so the whole stress thing. yes i am stessing over so much stuff that i have to get done that is not related to school at all. i need to get my passport done soon. so that i can travel. i need to get the pictures taken (where im not allowed to smille or they will think im a terrorist, yes cause i have the guts to blow stuff up and kil people) then i need to send the stuff in soon so i can get it back intime to go.. or if i have the time drive downtown and wait in an uber long line. i need to get a background check so that i can get into the ecce program. early childhood care and education. becuase you know they dont want rapists and such working with little kids. i also need that background check for volunteering which starts in febuary. once again same reason dont want weirdos volunteering with little kids. i need to finish filling out the forms so i acctualy can get accepted into the program. i know i will get in im already in camosun. and they already have all the proof of my good grades and all that jazz.

but i need to get it in and hopefully be accepted before febuarary cause i need to prove to the preschool that im going to be volunteering for the course. not casue im a creeper who likes to watch little kids. so yes all this fourms and sighning up for crap is stressing me out. but im planning on talking to the police tommorow about getting a background check. and i will hopefully have the forms filled out and be signed up for the ecce by monday.

on a happier off topic note i made cookies today with matt. that was fun. i kinda screwed up a bit by putting things in the wrong bowls but then matt helped me fix it and the cookies turned out great...although im sure quite a bit of the cookies got eaten before they even made it in the oven. but then they turned out great. we also watched supernatural.

and this note if a.d.d cause even though im talking about cookies im thinking about that camosun form that is siting on the table a bit down from me that i should probably fill out. WHY DO I PROCRASTINATE. i will get everything done. i will relax.

*sigh*. i suck at bloging.....

im to distracted. hey look cider. maybe i should drink that :P

yumm peach

wow i have not posted in a long time. i would like to be able to say that my reason for that is becasue i have been really busy. busy with school, busy with work, and just all around busy with life. and although that is true to some degree i think in reality i am just blogger lazy. and also forgetful. so what did i do today. what is going on in my life. well life. life is fun. i am currently only taking two courses at school. thats becasue im trying to switch my programs. instead of being a elementry school teacher i desided to be a preschool teacher. this is because i want to work with younger kids. i love kids. maybe because im so much like them. i love jumping in big puddles when it rains. and the idea of finger painting makes me happy. im such a little kid it its not even funny.

so the days that i go to school are tusday and thrusday. starting in febuary mondays and wednesdays are going to be used for volunteering at a preschool. and right now im working friday and saturday mornings. 5:30-2 GROSS. ya i know early equals mass suckage but atl east i get off early and still get to go out saturdays. oh and the place i work, relay airport gift shop. wooot. i sell cheap crap at expensive prices. and i know that cause i hear customers complain about it alot. even though what we mainly sell is drinks and chips and gum. so yes thats a tad of my fill in. most of my friends now whats going on with me so i dont feel the need to fill in anymore.

so today. i drove downtown with shannon. we meet up with brynn and we went shoping. i would say all in all it was a succesful shoping day. i bought a leather jacket which i have wanted for a while.

okay let me refraise that.

i bought a pleather jacket. not real leather but hey im trying to save up money to travel. (to scotland, and ireland in the summer with fiona hopefully we will make it to spain after to participate in the yearly giant tomato fight but scotland is our main goal) so i dont really feel like spending 100 dollers or over on a jacket. i ended up spending 45. i also got a shirt from utopia i love that store. if i had more money i would buy all of my clothes from there.

brynn, shannon and i also raided the bay center, a record store, and curiouse commics. shannon bought me a graphic novel that looks really interesting. and she bought some posters for her room.

so ya there is more that i could write about for today but im starting to feel like im rambeling maybe thats becasue i have not blogged in a while, or maybe its because i actually am starting to ramble which i have a habbit of doing even when i dont blog. so anyway im going to end this blog. and continue paying attention to the movie that i should be watching with my dad. yay kill bill. i love quinten tarintino movies. i actually bought a pulp fiction poster the other day, quentin tarintino has not made a movie in a while....i hope he comes out with something new soon.


anyway im rambling again, so im ending this post for the second time.

tired, gross, and dieing

well the tittle basically sums up how i feel right now...except for the dieing part,i guess. for the past four days i have not gotten less then five hours of sleep a night. not only that but the days have been full of so much stuff. ok, so, i guess i should explain this. sort of give you and idea of why im so tired lol.
Saturday:
-wake up-call friends to organize going to beach-hang out at beach for most of the day-come home exahusted, have shower, go out again
- go to sleep over
- stay up till three in morning
- sleep on overheated air matrise with other person

sunday:
-wake up at four..realize this is too early fall back asleep
-wake up at six thirty realize this is still to early..why am i waking up. fall back asleep
- wake up at 8:30 gives up..stays awake. for about a couple hours..then falls asleep when frinds go groccery shoping for caffine and breakfeast
.- leave appartment, go through carwash, watch table flight out of back of truck. jump out throw it back in.
- goes home. calles friend, goes out again
- hangs out with friend for lunch and goes back to appartment with friend for another sleep over
-stays up till 12-sleeps on couch

monday:- wakes up takes friend (at about nine in the mornging home). comes home and sleeps till 5 at night
-trys to go to sleep at ten, because i have to wake up at six on tuesday, but cant. goes on computer till 1 in morning cause i cant fall asleep

.tuesday:
-wake up at six, feels dead
- catch ferry with parents and drive to whistler to visit older brother
- five hours later arive at whistler see brother for 5 minutes go on ziplines with dad (amazingly fun...zipping hundreds of feet over trees and rivers on a cord..i would deffinitly do it again).that took 3 hours
- have lunch with brother start to drive home with parents

basically affter that, on the drive home we got stuck in a crap load on traffic. stuck in vancouver becasue on one bridge there was a accedent, and on the other bridge that could have been used to cross someone decided that tuesday would be a good day to jump off the bridge and kill themslef so that bridge was closed...if you ever going to kill yourself the least you can do is to take your car and drive off a cliff in the middle of no where. that way you not effecting thoes of us who are still here living out lives..and hey there will be one less car on the road..my word that was a long day. we missed our ferry and i ended up staying in my dads hotel room. sharing a bed with him well my mom sleeped on the couch. being a mom she refused to let me sleep on the couch...for some odd reason. then we woke up at six this morning and because my dad is working in vancouver and cannot drive us my mom and i had to bus to the ferry's and then catch them home. at the moment i feel like i just wanna find a bed and not wake up till tommorow.

but i have a feeling that, that would not be a good idea considering that i have to start my first day of work at one today. but i do no for a fact. that when i get home tonight im going to take a shower because i feel uber gross from all that. and then go to sleep.

on the brightside even though we were traped in vancouver we got to see the fireworks. that was fun...oh my gosh im tired

birthday

well my birthday is getting really close. actually it is tommorow. and i have come to the conclusion that i am just an odd person. i know there are a number of reasons for me saying this :P but i have one main reason for pointing this out now. i am an odd person becasue for the past month i have been counting down the days till my brithday all excited about being nineteen. you know, it seems like an important age. reason to be excited. but now that my birthday is one day away i am no where near as excited. i am actually the oppisit. im kinda like wow i dont really wanna get older i dont wanna grow up. i mean 19 will be a fun age. the time when i can leagaly drink. and go to clubs and all that fun stuff. but it also means more responsibility. i have this bad habbit of sometimes not wanting to acknolage or accept responsibility. i really dont wanna grow up. i wanna saty 18. 18 seems like a decent age sure you cant drink but you can do every thing else. another thing is that 90% of my friends are younger then me. whats the fun of being old enough to drink if you have to wait for your friends.


i have this bad fear of growing up, of getting old. and i know there is this whole thing that people say like no matter how old you get you can still be a kid. and i think i do a decent job of proving that saying. but still honestly i find myself getting scared at the idea of one day being old...being that old lady in a scooter. and i know that is a long way away. but i dont want it to come, i want to stay young. i dont want to get so old that i trun into one of thoes old ladies who cant even function, who gets put in a home just because she is too much hassle to look after even if her family does love her. i dont wanna become that old lady who becomes a hastle for her family.

i know that im overthinking this whole age thing way too much because honestly im only turning 19 im still young. but something struck me the other day. i know my dad was totaly joking but he said "wow your going to be 19 in a couple of days. that means i can legally kick you out of the house". and i was kinda like what..... no.. he was kidding and thats not going to happen.

but on the upside of all this fear i get to go out to bosten pizza and get a vodka slurpie. on thrusday (the day affter my birthday). so that should be fun... maybe just the fact that im excited over a vodka slurpie proves that im not really growing up that much.

i dont want any beer or champaine or anything nice along thoes lines. give me the surgary drink filled with crap and booz. how much do you wanna bet im not even going to like the taste of it ?:P

bored bored bored today, yesterday was better

so today has been one of the most uneventful days that i have had in a long time. i was supposed to get together with a friend that i have not seen since febuary but that did not work out. and it was sorta to late to make plans to go out and do anything today considering most of my friends are younger then me and have school, or they were already out doing something. which left me to sit at home and twiddle my thumbs. so today mainly consisted of sleeping, eating, walking the dog. watching invader zim and hanging out on the computer. and right now i feel so bored i could die ...

some people find it extreamly relaxing to have a day when you do nothing like this... yes that can be true but most of the time for me. i would rather be doing something with someone. or at least have a friend over to do nothing with me. im getting tempted to go be a loner and catch the bus and raid sidney right now..sidney is small you never now maybe i will run into someone i know that i can hang out with.

yesterday was so much better then today. i was not bored once yesterday...well not that i can recal. but then again yesterday was a wednesday, and wednesday has unofically become Laura and shannon hang out day. so i whent to visit a bunch of my friends at lunch at their school yesterday which was fun. i love going back to the old school it makes me feel so popular, consideing about 80% of my friends are younger then me and still in highschool. when i go there i swear everyone has a tracker in their heads that lets them know exsactly where i am. becasues i always seem to get swarmed by friends. which is great.

then later on, on wednesday i picked shannon up from school. we had to run some errands like go to her work so that she could request days that she needed off of work. then we decided that we would go to sidney and make a video for our friend ben who lives in germany. we have not talked to him in a long time and we decided to do something. speaking of that video i still need to lend my camera to a bunch of bens other friends so that this can end up being a good video not just one from shannon and i.

affter running around sidney acting like idots we drove to our friend chris's house becasue he invited to have us over for dinner. chris is an amazing cook by the way. omgosh chris if your reading this i will come over to your house for dinner any time that was good good goood. he made teriyaki chicken and rice yummy. the night continued with us watching the movie high fidelity, and playing brawl. which chris one most of the time. shannon won twice although in all honesty i am pretty sure chris was going easy on us.

yes so yesterday was a heck of alot of fun...well today was. not so much. oh well tommorow will be better its friday tommorow, and as long as its sunny i know there will be an adventure. i can already tell, or at least im hopeing.

update..sorta

so, i orginaly thought i would try and update and say what i have been up to since i gave up on blogging, but that has been over a year and i am thinking that would take up way to much time, and not to mention a heack of alot of blog space, but for key facts for anyone who does not know

-i got my N in july (yay) and im going to camosun now. thoes are the main facts if i think of anything else really big i will post it.

so yes so, what have i been up to? well last night i had shannon and werner over to watch my fair lady. i love that movie it has to be one of my all time favorites. you know how some people have comfort food that they eat when they are feeling sad or whatever? well i have a comfort movie and my fair lady is it. i don't know what it is about this movie but it just makes me happy.i was telling shannon this and she had an urge to watch it. That is why we watched it last night. But usually my fair lady has a habit of just comming on tv..when im going through one of thoes days. I will give you and example. ok so this valentines day i was being a stupid emo single person and going through one of thoes really lame emo days that everyone gets (especially on valentines day) and a crap load of my friends seemed to be out with their boyfriends or their girlfriends or working or just to busy to go out and do anything. and my brother was out with friends, and my parents were out for dinner. so i could not even be the lame kid who hung out with her parents or family :P.

so while i was sitting and being all stupid and emo, guess what came on tv, thats right my fair lady. instantly that movie made me feel better. and i was not sad or lonley anymore. i was being the compleate dork that i am and i was singing along to the songs and everything. which is easier to do when your the only one home.

then last month i got this stupid emo feeling again, and gaing my fair lady came on tv. and then once again i was feeling better. i love this movie it has magjic powers i swear.

so yes shannon werner and i watche that movie and it was pretty awsome, for me anyway. shannon and werner said that they liked it as well which was good. i dislike making people watch movies that they dont like just because i like it, i feel bad. i was acutally kind of worried that shannon might find it boring but she really seemed to enjoy it. and actually said that she wants it now. The only thing that sucked about the movie last night was the fact that it keeped fuzzing out on some parts , silly vhs. anyway that is all that i can think of to say right now.

oh peice of advise. if a vhs is going all fuzzy dont try yelling at it and claping your hands, it does not work, you cant scare it into working. even though i did try :D

long time no talk

so over a year ago i gave up on this blog. mainly for two reasons. one because i belived that i never wrote anything interesting and nothing worth acutally reading, so whats the point in keeping a blog if nothing intersting is being writen right? and two becasue the blog website was being stupid and not letting me sign in. but now affter getting that fixed up i have desided that i am going to give this bloging thing another try. even though i know the majority of the people i know also gave up on blogging a while ago. .

anyway i need to go and catch a bus considering its my brothers day with the vehicle, but i will be sure to up date and fill people in on whats been going on in my life later.

me list re-posted

so some people wanted to know how many things i had left on my list and in all honety i forgot. of course i could have just looked and poseted up the number but hey any one can do things the easy way.. so here you go my list of things to do before i die. oh and the numbers with stars beside them are the things i have done.. enjoy reading this thing...lol

Things to do before I die
Laura Matthews

1. Graduate
2. Go to Scotland
3. Travel across Canada
*4. See phantom of the opera live
5. Meet all the living members from Led zeppelin
*6. Send a message in a bottle
7. Go to the Paris opera house
8. Give birth
9. Donate blood
10. Go streaking
11. Write a book and get it published
12. Go scuba diving
*13. Eat haggis
*14. See how many marshmallows I can fit in my mouth
15. Read war and piece
16. Be on every continent
17. Join a protest (that I believe in)
18. Write a letter to five famous people and see who responds first
19. Get my portrait done
20. Milk a cow
21. Ride a llama
22. Fall madly in love
23. Drop a penny off the empire state building
24. Send Alyssa a hot Scottish guy
25. Pet a sheep in ten different countries
26. Find out what McDonalds burgers are really made of
27. Swim in a pool filled with ice tea
28. Go in a hot air balloon
29. Start a food fight
30. Kiss in the rain
31. Go hang gliding
32. Moon George bush
*33. Hug a tree
34. Make the work koober popular
*35. Dance in the rain
*36. Make balloon dart paint
37. Make a giant finger painting
38. Make a sea shell necklace
39. Read the bible from cover to cover
40. Wear an avocado face mask and convince 3 other people to do it with me
*41. Go to youth convention
42. Ride in a limo
43. Dress as a clown
44. Create a time capsule with a group of my friends
*45. Yell recola on the top of my lungs off a cliff
46. Pet a dolphin
47. Touch the worlds larges coffee pot
*48. Dress as the phantom for Halloween
49. Adopt a chilled in need
50. Take keyboard lessons
51. Touch a shark
52. Go to a jimmy page concert
53. See green day in concert for the second time
54. Watch the movie Casablanca
55. Have a giant water balloon fight
56. Throw a pie in someone’s face
57. Get my full drivers license
58. Be and audience member in the Ellen degenerous show
59. Be an audience member in the tonight show
60. Attempt to learn Gaelic
*61. Pull an all nighter (watch the sun set and rise)
62. Witness and eclipse
63. Witness a meteor shower
64. Find a job I love
65. Overcome my fear of clowns
66. Buy a Laura Lilly and grow it
67. Create my own family tradition
68. Do the terry fox run
69. Go to bible collage
70. Send someone a dozen red roses
71. Receive a dozen red roses
72. Fly in a helicopter
73. Work with kids.
74. Wear a skirt with my family tartan on it
75. Get married
76. Run through a felid of sun flowers
77. Take lots of pictures
78. Live life to the fullest
79. Create my own flavor of ice cream
80. Write some one and entire letter using only my mouth
*81. Hug Natasha without getting pushed, shoved, poked, punched, jabbed, kicked, hit or any other type of physical violence in return
82. Roll down a soft hill into a lake
*83. Throw a snowball in the summer
*84. Shower under a water fall
85. Buy my own house and spend the time making it what I want
86. Go bungee jumping
87. Touch a pyramid in Egypt
88. Dip my feet in the Nile
89. Jump off of a bridge with a group of my friends just because of the saying if your friends jumped off a bridge would you do it to
90. Give up phantom for a month
91. Swim in every ocean
92. Eat only red food for a day
93. Get a star named after me
94. Burst into dance and song like in the movies
95. Shake hands with someone famous
96. Take a mud bath
97. Make flying cow t-shirts with Shannon
98. Help Shannon burn evil clown painting
99. Go to a 48 may concert with Shannon
100. Try and go a whole day walking backwards
*101. See Shannon dress up a Mario for Halloween
*102. Kick josh
103. At Jennies wedding read the note that I wrote at her house
104. Go skinny dipping
105. Meet some you tube celebrities
*106. Build a fort and spend the night in it
107. Walk through a car wash
108. Be a two or more places at once
109. Ride an elephant
110. Learn to write with my right hand
111. Get my entire body painted
112. Make a beaded curtain out of can opener thingies
113. Be and extra in a film
114. Visit the Webb crystal factory in England
115. Go to the island of Arran in Scotland
116. Make and entire thanksgiving meal all on my own
117. Celebrate Canada day in an other country (again)
118. See great, great uncle Courtney Cox’s grave in Dieppe
119. Offer random people hugs like that guy on you tube
120. go and see rocky horror picture show in theaters with a group of friends.(dressing up is optional)


he he i am crazy

-laura

one year of blogging

So it has been about a year that I have had this blog for. And I remember that my first post was my list of things that I plan on doing before I die. So I thought for this post I would say all the things on that list that I have done in a year. This should be interesting he he.

#4. See phantom of the opera live: yep I did that. I think I even turned one of my parents into a phan in the processe.

#6. Send a message in a bottle: thank you sarah. Fun trowing that bottle off of the Sidney peir . I wonder if any one ever found it?

#13. Eat haggis: that’s right I did it…Robbie burns day

#14. See how many marshmallows I can fit in my mouth: only 3 because I have heard of people choking that way and I was a chiken.

#33. Hug a tree: good ol parkland court yard

#35. Dance in the rain: thank you kaitlin good times.

#36. Make balloon dart paint: my house that was fun. If you need proof talk to Sarah I believe it is hanging up in her bed room.

#41. Go to youth convention: awesomeness hey Shannon remember listening to brother yusef on the ride back he he.

#45. Yell recola on the top of my lungs off a cliff: me Fiona and Sidney spit what can I say.. We are teenage girls that cannot be held responsible for our actions.

#48. Dress as the phantom for Halloween: of course I did this I mean common did anyone doubt. Thank you to Rachel and Shannon who helped me find parts for my costume.

#61. Pull an all nighter (watch the sun set and rise): girls sleep over that was fun..Shannon remember …oh man wow we are silly.

#81. Hug Natasha without getting pushed, shoved, poked, punched, jabbed, kicked, hit or any other type of physical violence in return: ha ha I did that and I have the picture to prove it

#84. Shower under a water fall: yay camp t-bird

#101. See Shannon dress up a Mario for Halloween: fun fun fun Natasha’s Halloween party

so ya that is all that i did hope i did not bore anyone who spent there time reading this.
have a great day

-laura

Breaking the stereotype

So I was reading someone else’s bog and they were wondering why teenagers are always perceived as bad? Or trouble makers? I made a long rant about stereotypes and I could have made a longer one but I stopped because I did not want to fill up to much on her bog. So I have sort of made this list to prove (as if it need proof) that those stereotypes are wrong.

Teens are All Having Sex & Getting Pregnant
-umm no that some teen are having sex… (No idea why) but not every one. With all that we have had drilled into us lots of teens are to afraid to even get merely close to doing that because teachers and guardians have been drilling in our minds since grade six that we could die of freaken aids or something.

Teens are all Violent and Dangerous
- Umm I start to wonder were the crap this came from….paranoid people. I am not even going to touch this one. it will take up way to much space

Teens are Disrespectful of Adults
-not true most of us are very respectful to adults. And what I have found well at least with me is that most of the time when we are disrespectful to adults is when the adults are disrespectful to us first. When they talk down to us and treat us like we know nothing and judge us or act like we are up to no good before they even know us. So yes. Moving on

Teens Don't Care About the Future
- Ha ha ha ha ha were the heck did this come from... it is myth that we care about nothing but fun but how many of us teens have a job…are making a difference, volunterring. I know I volunteer all the time. And every one I hang out with especially this year I have heard talking bout the future and what they are planning on doing. If anything we are worrying to much about the future.

Teens are all High
-high on life, god, friendship, family. Nothing else for me thank you very much



Yes well those are some of stereo types. Hope you enjoyed my little rant.
-Laura

yet another song

so i was wanting to update but i had no idea what i was going to update this blog with so i decided to go look through songs that i like and post some song lyrics again. well i found a song and i planning on posting it but i realized that this song that i am going to post is well rather depressing then a thought came to me... why do we like listening to depressing songs.. is there a part of us that actually likes the feeling of being depressed or emo. or do we listen to them because we when we hear the lyrics there is a part of us that makes us feel like we can relate to what the singer/band is saying. or maybe it is just fun to listen to when you are acctually feeling like how the singer/ band describes.

i donno any way yes that is my only deep thought in this post..if you can even call that thought deep more random then anything. here is the song

Child of the wilderness
Born into emptiness
Learn to be lonely
Learn to find your way in darkness
Who will be there for you
Comfort and care for you
Learn to be lonely
Learn to be your one companion
Never dreamed out in the world
There are arms to hold you
You’ve always known your heart was on its ownS
o laugh in your loneliness
Child of the wilderness
Learn to Be lonely
Learn how to love life that is lived alone
Learn to be lonelyLife can be lived life can be loved alone


ya sorry made anyone feel emo or depressed by thoes lyrics but i am odd and i actually like that song.

well hope that your all having a wonderful day

-laura